"Err... your label's sticking out luv" - Rachael Watson
"Hold on a moment. Have we swapped jackets?" - Jacquie Helm
"Dandruff? You should try using 'Head & Shoulders' dear." - Liz Farnan
"Can I zip you up dear" - Beryl Ladd
"You've over done it with the make-up again this year" - M. Glencross
"As soon as the light turns green, start your take off run - Chocks away!" - Andrew Davidson, Isle of Wight
"Dont look now, but that doctors taking a photo of us!" - Ashley K. Howard
"Don't you think this is a bit short for you dear?" - Ionne Hammond, Suffolk
"Uh Huh ! Haven't washed behind your neck again, have you?" - Neil J.
"Yes, your bum does look big in that black dress, dear!" - Derek Ladkin
"Yes, your bum does look big in that!" - David Stokes
"Does my bum look big in this?" - Errick Peterson, Co. Wexford
"Does my Bum look big in this?" - Anita
"For the final time " your bum doesn't look big in feathers" - Jean Mc
"No, it looks fine to me love." - MRC
"You know we’re called sea parrots? Well, there’s a little pirate on your shoulder." - Valerie Falconer
"I think you may be asthmatic – I don’t like that puffin" - Rob Falconer
"Just one slight feather out of place round the back!" - Anne Anderson
"We wont be doing this next year - can't afford the bills these days" - Julian, Devon
"Do you think this shade of lipstick suits me" - Ann Greenizan
"Why are you huffin puffin? Been up to no good with her next door again" - John Dye
"All we have to do is work on the head and could pass as penguins" - Ross Geissmann, Redcliffe Q'land, Australia